We’ve all been there before, it’s the end of a long week, your boss is a bore and you’re feeling kinda footloose restless. It sounds to me like you might be hungry for some good old verse… How about penning a bawdy sea shanty to cure what ails ya?
The ballad. The ballad! Fellas, mollies and the old street wretch can’t help but tap tootsies to a folksy ballad. It is pleasant and puerile pub poetry, carefree and coarse, cute and crude, corrupt and callous, crass and creepy. It’s a nose up stink to high flutin’ talk and corporate kites, it don’t care about what’s proper or polite, it’ll calm down tempers or start brewin’ a fight…yikes, I’m getting carried away…
Anyway, my point is, instead of getting drunk at the end of a work week, why not write a ballad, and then get drunk.
How to write a ballad with yer mates
Everyone put your business card on the table.
Agree on a topic.
On the back of a card, write one quatrain per card – which is four lines with an A B A B rhyme scheme (alternating cross-rhymed iambic pentameter for those whom are interested in the proper parlance). Clap each line in your mind or aloud as there should be four or three beats per line. For example:
There’s nothin’ like a ballad song (A) (4 beats)
For makin’ tools stand out (B) (3 beats)
They’ll sing aloud and carry on (A) (4 beats)
Till the bouncer gives ‘em clout (B) (3 beats)
Once everyone has written a quatrain on the back of their card, order the cards together in a natural sequence to create an original swashbuckling ballad!
Till next time, crack a queer whid!
Psst! Did you know that the English word Ballad comes from the Italian word ballare, which means ‘to dance’.